This is a very powerful exercise. You should try this once first before committing to doing it regularly. This exercise is only one minute long. You can set your kitchen or egg timer for a minute to let you know when the exercise is complete.

First, sit across from each other with knees close together. Second, maintain eye contact. Third, one person say “I love you” to the other person. Let’s say Harry starts by saying, “I love you” to Sally. Then Sally has to let those words “I love you” into her heart, not her head. This is critical. When she feels she has absorbed these words, she says, “Thank you.” This way she verbally acknowledges this love deposit from Harry.

Then Sally says “I love you” to Harry. After Harry lets the “I love you” sink into his heart he says, “Thank you.” Then he tells Sally again, “I love you,” she says, “Thank you” then tells Harry, “I love you,” then he says, “Thank you.”

This saying “I love you” back and forth goes on for one minute. When doing this exercise, stick with just the words “I love you.” Don’t add to this or make it sexual in any way. The idea behind this exercise is that many of us know that our spouses love us. We say it all the time: “Love ya, babe,” or “See ya, love ya.” These are great habits, but it’s really good to soak in the love of your spouse.

There is a big difference between knowing someone loves you and experiencing that somebody loves you. As you do this exercise you are really experiencing the love the other person has for you. Your spouse is depositing his or her love intentionally in your heart, and you are intentionally letting that love into your heart.

I must warn you, some of you will laugh at first because you feel uncomfortable. Some of you will cry because your heart has so rarely experienced love this deeply. Either way, if you add this to your menu it can be a very powerful one minute of your Ten-Minute Marriage Principle.

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